Baby numero dos, second to baby numero uno (that ball of cute babe-age, Sean Murf), landed on my doorstep a few days ago:
Waahhhhhh! Can you hear it crying a-la-just-born-baby? Mommy, look at me! Here I am!
Why, hello sweetie! Yes, I'm glad you're here, after more than two years of working and waiting and gestating!
Unlike Sean, produced in a heated moment of intercourse, this second baby started out differently (and if you've seen little ditty before, scroll down and ignore):
One night in Ecuador, 2007
I sat on a wall with a hot guy named Kevin,
Sipping a beer while I bitched about life.
And then Kevin said, "Hey, my sad little wife!
Take all those thoughts swirling 'round in your head,
and spin them into something funny instead!"
"But what's so damned funny?" I asked with a frown.
He said "you won't know if you don't write it down."
So I did.
Now after two-and-a-half years of typing,
of adding, deleting, hoping and griping,
of family and friends pushing me hard,
of whining to Kevin that "writing is hard!"
Finally it's here: my very first book!
It would sure mean a lot if you'd go take a look.
It might make you chuckle, or find yourself crying,
but in Kevin's words: you won't know without trying!
It would mean so much to me, really and truly a lot, if you'd give this book a read and help me spread the word about it - particularly to newly KuKd or TTC mommas/daddas who might be feeling like crap. It's hard for me to say that here without sounding really slimy and self-promotional to my own ears, blegh. Rest assured, my goal is not to make a million bucks off it (as I recently told a friend, I hardly get a dime off each copy sold - so I'll consider myself lucky if this book buys me a couple of Coronas and a new laser ink cartridge). ]
Really, I want it to be read by you and others because I'm hoping that readers will connect with some of the feelings and thoughts expressed on its pages. The book - not so much a literary classic story with a beginning and end, but rather a series of snapshots of surreal KuKd life - is the product of my own feeling weirded out and isolated over the past few years. And it's got drawings, too - which I did on the #174 bus on route to work. Things like:
Me, pretty sure there's a tumor in my brain slowly killing me (see it making my face melt?)
Me versus Mammary Glands: realizing in horror that my boobs think there's a real-life baby to feed.
And of course, Zachary. The Zachary of my imagination, what he would have looked like in his teens.
I'm also hoping that a fellow KuKd'er might tell me something like: "OH YEAH - I totally felt that exact same way!" And hey: if you live in the Seattle area, why not come to my happy little BOOK LAUNCH PARTY - 7pm on April 28th? E-mail me if you'd like the deets - firstname.lastname@example.org.
ANYWAY. You can find the book at Amazon.